Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Wife arrested - penis in garbage disposal

In Garden Grove, California, a wife (allegedly) fed her husband drugged food, tied him naked to a bed, cut off his penis and threw it into the garbage disposal! My gawd, haven't they heard of a safe word? Everyone involved in kink knows that. The police found him bleeding profusely, still tied. And most likely crying.
This woman had a powerful hate on for her estranged husband. And kitchen knives are usually dull. Go look at your butter knife!

At least Lorena Bobbitt just tossed it out the car window. In that case the police went searching along Lorena's route and found it, lying there all innocent and meek having been nearly run over by a cement truck, crows on the overhead wires looking down. They asked one lady if she had seen a penis and she said yes, she had, her uncle's in the shower when she was nine.
They reattached that one.

In this case they didn't say whether a plumber was called to open the sink trap. But they might not have been able to distinguish the remains from the rutabaga she had peeled earlier.
They allege Catherine Kieu Becker drugged the meal and served it to her estranged husband shortly before the attack.
The 51-year-old man felt sick, went to lie down and lost consciousness. The victim's arms and legs were tied to the bed with rope, (not silk rope either)  his clothes removed and he was attacked with the kitchen knife as he awoke. All that holding and sawing, of course he awoke! They said he was conscious when his penis was removed. Like really. Would he doze off?
It was tossed into the running garbage disposal. No thoughts whatsoever of the recycle bin.

You men stop shuddering like that! And you women stop chuckling! It used to be the wife took us for the house, the car and the children, but this? I now cringe when my wife throws a rotton old banana into the disposal.

Ms Becker may be charged with - aggravated mayhem, false imprisonment, assault with a deadly weapon, administering a drug with intent to commit a felony, poisoning and spousal abuse. Bail was set at $1 million. Is that all?
When contacted the victim only said. "This is a private matter." 
Well it is not private at all, there is now post-traumatic-stress among husbands everywhere thinking of their own treasured privates!
My wife just made cookies. Chocolate chip, my favorite, good stuff, but now I have to call her into the room, have her stand there in front of me and look into her eyes as I eat one! Watching for any sign of deceit or subterfuge ...... or sparkle. I thought of getting a witness but then I'd have to share the cookies.
Our relationship is strained at the moment because she caught me switching dinner plates. I have PTSD already.

Lorena Bobbitt claimed years of sexual abuse drove her to the attack, and she was acquitted by reason of insanity. Who knows what defense Catherine Kieu Becker's lawyers will choose, the Extrapolated Penis Envy defense? Kink gone Krazy defense? Weiner Rage defense? Not sure but we need to keep this quiet. No sense giving women ideas. You have no idea how many females grinned with empathy for Lorena Bobbitt.

But starting right now I will only eat my wife's cookies in a crowded public place with my phone on speed dial to an ambulance.
Private matter indeed.
.
.
.

1 comment:

  1. You would definitely agree with me that you do not want waste food clogged in the drain in every usage and leave you searching for the jam wrench.When selecting the best garbage disposal for your household

    ReplyDelete

Keep it real - spam or links will be eliminated